On this day last year, we were about to set off to pick up Brian’s son for the weekend, when Lucy remembered that there was a parcel waiting at the post office. In the parcel was the wedding ring we’d ordered from a Fairtrade silver crafter on Etsy, so it was an exciting delivery. There was time to run across to the post office to collect it, but not enough time to open it before leaving. So, it got opened in the car, and once we arrived we were both able to look at it properly. Then of course Lucy had to try it on to make sure it fitted, so Brian did the honours. We both jokingly said ‘I do.’
And then, both at the same time, we acknowledged that we couldn’t think of any reason why taking the ring off, putting it away, and then organising for someone else to oversee it being put on again because they have some “power vested in them” to say it is official should make us any more married than we already felt. So, the ring stayed on and we went off and had a nice breakfast in a café feeling very much married – as we had done for years – but now having a visible symbol of it!
We got married (by the power vested in our love) in the car, wearing whatever was to hand that morning, with Brian’s son in the back seat as the only guest.
Today is the first anniversary of our DIY wedding, and we’ve spent it doing a mixture of useful, relaxing and indulgent things:
Brian is making a new walking stick, so lots of whittling has been going on:
Lucy is cutting kindling in the garden for next winter’s fires, and has been admiring the beauty of lichen (and hearing the first frog call of the year):
We’ve been out to buy timber for the roof repairs, and on the way back treated ourselves to a chocolate tart. There may also be a takeaway later. And as on every day since 1 March last year, at several moments Lucy will twiddle with or polish her rings and we’ll both feel very happy that we did things our own way. Our marriage is the way we relate to each other every day. If we feel we need to make our status more official in future, the option is still there, and we can do that in our own way too. No white dresses, stiff suits, or silly hats required!